A princess or a prisoner

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Why Girls suffered in restricted families?

I’m not trying to hit any specific cast and religion, I’m trying to point out those restricted families who don’t allows their daughters to take even a single breath independently.
This issue is not only belongs to Pakistan many people of different countries are also facing this kind of gender discrimination, but today I’m only talking about my country. Unfortunately, in Pakistan, girls who were born in the backward and restricted families face different types of discrimination.
Girls also bore injustice on the basis of gender if he is a man so he has a permission to do whatever he want… but if she is a girl so they don’t allows to live her life.
I’m here to enlightening the life of girls ‘who have everything in life except life!’
She can’t go alone outside or to make decisions for her own life, she can’t laugh loudly, they restricts her in wearing, Abaya and veil as these are necessary for her life, many other restrictions she bear in her whole life.
Her father and brother treated her harshly. Every common girl who belongs to restricted family is facing all these types of inferiority in family. She bears and had to live in this pain.
I want to shed light on tribal, northern and nomadic areas where girls sold and bought like animals. They even didn’t allow her to express their pain; fought for her rights. She is living like corpse!
Girls faced many grim situations but didn’t complain against this injustice. If she tried to raise her voice against injustice so they suppressed her voice for life time. She doesn’t have her own life she lives according to her family orders.
She treated them in very brutality manners. She can’t marry according to her own will, can’t see dreams for her own self, didn’t made decision for her own self, didn’t allow to chase her dreams! She lived like a prisoner and as her family want to.
She didn’t have any freedom of speech even, perhaps, before marriage they bear little bit oppression but after marriage they bear all kind of injustice, as compare to before marriage’s life, her husband beats and crushes her rights but she bears silently and doesn’t raise her voice against injustice or offenses activities.
She is not only bear all mass for herself but she is also creating history and establishing injustice for her own race those will be also suffer in future.
Childhood engagements also common in these types of families they didn’t even think once what kind of future they are giving to their princess! when they think about their decision the time has been passed yet they couldn’t help her.
Especially, when they forcefully tied her with anyone because their princess is their own property and made their princess scapegoat on the name of Izaat!
Girl who is a part of the conservative family she really couldn’t know, when she became victim from princess!
As an educated woman I think, we should raise our voice against any kind of injustice. If Islam gives women rights so why we put aside those rights for our so cold family who don’t even thinks we are human not animals! So why we should bothers them?
Freedom is our basic right, so how our family or parents can put us behind the bars for the sake of house or family respects. If they don’t care about our feelings and self-respect so why we care about them? If we want to fly beyond the sky so we should do it but live in our limits. We should also follow our rules as a girl.
Someone well said “Woman is like a stream until stream flow in their limits it brings happiness but when it crosses their limits then brings destruction”

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Choosing your husband is also choosing your future!

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Provoked Movie review:
Provoked is a British biographical drama film, pictured on reality based story. This is maybe not super hit movie but its plot is very strong because it’s hitting on a bitter reality of our society…
Last night I felt boredom so I decided to watch some interesting movie suddenly I saw an English Hindi movie “provoked” which released in 2006. After watched this movie I felt very bad for our Asian women, those parents teaches them everything except how to save their self-respect! How to save humanity for being abused!
Kiranjit Ahluwalia is playing a lead role in this movie she belonged to a small village of Punjab; she was very innocent chic clad girl. She wed with a UK based boy, this is a typical arranged marriage, after wedding she moved to UK with her husband.
In the beginning she lived life full of color and fantasy with him but after sometime he exposed his real color to her. During these circumstances she gave the birth to two baby boys. They were also cute like mother. In this movie a husband is showed as an ugly man who felt complex with his wife’s beauty!
He was beaten and physical abused her since ten years. He is psychopath and atrocious person, alcoholic addicted, made scum relations and slept with other girls; treated her ruthlessly as an animal, even than she bore all his vicious and oppression because of marriage.
At the end she burned him when one night he was sleeping alcoholic. At last she took a criminal step and committed a crime. She didn’t think once which type of crime she was doing.
She is afraid of him. Her whole body showed the vicious activities of her husband. Not even a single part of her body was saved from her husband’s offenses. After that court put her behind the bars under the act of attempt to murder but unluckily in a short time he died; then court gave a verdict against her for 12 years sentenced!
During the hearing of case she was feeling ashamed by telling her whole story in front of judge and people she also faced the problem of language barrier; she couldn’t speak proper English that was worst thing as a defender!

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A question raised in my mind, are we prepare our daughters just for marriage? This is enough for a girl who later become a mother and responsible of our race…
One thing that really attracted to me was the strong role of media. This is true, media have a power to change many minds we can used it as a propaganda tool; can also use it for both right and wrong but it works. One N.G.O’s also involved in her matter and they tried to get freedom for her; also used media in that regard.
N.G.O also wrote a book on the life history of victim. She lived a horrible, miserable life with husband. The words of her in this movie touched my heart she said, “ instead of my husband I’m feeling safe in the jail”. This is very shameful words for a real man whose wife feels insecure with him!
She faced a very hard time in jail but “God” helped her and sent her a very good friend like an angle who helped her for the bail; N.G.O also helped her and her book exposed a real story of her life.
This is a very good and impressive movie have a hidden massage for all women. Power didn’t in body, power is in the brain so woman especially Asian woman should use their mental power and should respect her own self-respect!

Why should we respond to people?

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Today I am talking about this kind of question, what will people say? This is common question we listens it in our every day routine life by parents and relatives but I can’t understand why we bother this stupid question and why do we care about people?

To be very honest, I’m totally refused this kinda question; because if we are bother these so how can we chase our dreams and goals in our life. I think so our dreams are more important rather than bickering of people.

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We should ignore these kinda people. We should live life independently or freely but this absurd thinking is tried to remove our vivid personality and our natural spark.

After age of 19 to 20, our parents should think now we grown up so they should less interrupt in our daily routine life. Specially, never ever sued this kind of sentence, what will people say? They should ignore this question because these kinds of sentences demolished our personality.

I’m totally disagreed with this question because this intervened our dreams and goals and also destruct our personality and confidence. Now a days we need to stop this kind of thinking; need to much focus on our future not on people because people never happy with you at any cost.

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I’m pointed out that kind of people who’s always interrupting girl’s life through irritating sentences like “don’t eat too much you become fatty, don’t go in sunlight you will darker, don’t talk loudly what people say”, these types of views disturbed our daughters mental growth and personality too, they become shy if they are fatty or dark in color. They think she couldn’t fit in their circle because of her color, fat or loud voice then sometime they went in depression or suffered through mental stress.illustration-mother-talking-with-daughter

These stereo type thinking not only disturbed girls but also their mothers, I think so mothers are more suffering then daughters because they are responsible of her daughters.

A mother can easily felt her daughter’s pain, tension, depression, irritation, she better understand which kind of restrictions or words destroyed her daughter mental peace.

Women should have enough power to stopped( by giving shut up calls) this kind of views; it doesn’t matter that such type of words comes from her family or family friends but she should stopped because of her daughter’s personality, life and brought up.

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How can she move in a society while she has many doubts in her mind? How can she become a strong personality with these stupid doubts.

Mother should protect her daughter. She should properly aware her girl about this issue and also teaches her how to ignore this kind of nonsense, that’s how they can protect their daughters to some extent.

#MeriAwaz

Is Fashion trends astray our youth?

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Fashion trends comes and goes as fast as we can change our lipstick color. Fashion trends directly effect all aspect of our society. According to research, fashion is the cause of political, economical and social change, although fashion motivates our creativity on the other hand astray our youth.

 

Negative impact of latest fashion have greatly effect on girls. Even girls aren’t think about what style is suitable on them according to their age. Our youth adopted fashion just like it is the goal of their life. The upper class who can adopted latest fashion they seems satisfied but middle class who can’t afford latest fashion feel inferiority complex day by day.

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That’s why, our society become more complex in status. We find class difference in our society. We find madness of changing fashion in girls are so high; they even don’t  care about social values but also ignored Islamic values. Short jeans and sleeveless shirt, is this a Islamic value? Can a Muslim girl wear this type of dresses? Our Islam allowed this type of dress?

 

In society we can find one type of class who wear this kind of clothes comfortably. That kind of class Wearing funky or Classic, modern or traditional, Lush and costly branded clothes on daily bases they don’t even feel bad about short kind of dresses.

 

When i see this type of people a question raised in my mind is Islam only restrict middle class; upper class doesn’t have any responsibility of proper wearing? No Islamic laws implement on them. 1st fashion week was started in 1943 in New York. Basic purpose of this fashion week was, to diverted the attention of France’s people towards American designers, during world war 2nd.

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That mean we can change thinking of people through fashion trends. So why designers don’t introduce that kind of fashion who promoted not only our social values but also Islamic laws and clear the boundaries about their dresses of our youth specially in girls.

 

Now a days fashion trends mislead our youth. They are far away from their creative activities. Rather than they pay attention on future, they are busy in adopting latest fashion trends. Girls who belongs to middle class, can’t afford latest trends cause of low financial status which create more complexity.

 

Now a days, the dressing of the girl tells us that she belong to either upper class or lower class, if she wear less clothes like short jeans, sleeveless shirt, expensive watch etc that means she belongs to upper class, if a girl wear proper dress that mean she belongs to middle class; that difference is not the sign of developed countries rather than devastated sing of any country. Trend setters targeted younger audience and tried to set their mind according to their strategy.

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If we talk about positive aspect of fashion, fashion provides a chance to prominent their creative activities; People show their identity, ability and culture through fashion; We also show social values through our fashion and fashion can bring positive change in thoughts of our youth; so that we can abolish the status difference between two classes; also shed light on the features of Islamic values.

 

‘God’ whatever created things on earth they have limits and that limit is the beauty of the world. Whenever anybody break the rule of nature, bring disaster. Similarly, Islam also restricted us in dress so we should follow that; so those who introduce fashion and those who adopted fashion must be follow the rules introduced by Islam.

 

 

 

By: Syeda Sana Batool Kazmi